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Postby bunnyThor on Mon Aug 20, 2001 9:10 am

...is if Joe is earning points by not looking at her breasts ("How gallant!") or if he's <I>losing</I> points by not looking at her breasts ("Aren't they good enough?").<P>------------------
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Postby TeleGib on Mon Aug 20, 2001 9:12 am

With Ceilidh, it could be a bit of both. <IMG SRC="http://www.keenspot.com/KeenBoard/rolleyes.gif"><P>Shit, if it was me at that age, I'd have trouble looking her in the eye. <IMG SRC="http://www.keenspot.com/KeenBoard/eek.gif">
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what's best not to do.<p>[This message has been edited by TeleGib (edited 08-20-2001).]
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Postby Ursine on Mon Aug 20, 2001 9:18 am

We're talking total Zen Concentration. All great hockey players have it, especially if their top plate just got smashed.
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Postby David Adrian on Mon Aug 20, 2001 9:34 am

Yes, it can be done.<P>Yes, it is VERY difficult.<P>Yes, in the long run it's worth it.<P>And how I know is an INCREDIBLY long story.
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Postby Tangent on Mon Aug 20, 2001 9:41 am

And I for one am calling for DETAILS!!! DETAILS MAN!!!<P>Hey, it's hard enough not looking at the breasts of a woman when they're clothed, and when the woman in question is married. <IMG SRC="http://www.keenspot.com/KeenBoard/biggrin.gif"> (Just looking, not touching. I have *that* much decency in me.)<P>------------------
Robert A. Howard<P>------------------
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Postby DragonFlare on Mon Aug 20, 2001 9:53 am

I think it's best he not look down. For the sake of everything. If he did the mood would be worse.. and then what he said would not hold true.. about slowing down the relationship. <P>------------------
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Postby David Adrian on Tue Aug 21, 2001 2:08 am

Okay, Tangent, you want details, you'll get details.<P>This is a story of my past, half a lifetime gone. I was a geek, too uncool even to be a nerd. I mean, you name the nerd stereotype, I was there in spades: bad clothes, bad hair, bad skin, bad voice... (*shudders*) This is why I'm contracting Memory Lane for the Tobacco Road Treatment. Anyway, the only way I wasn't an archtypical nerd was this: I could talk to those magical creatures: **GIRLS**. I mean, really talk, not try to impress them (they wouldn't have been impressed anyway) or try to put the make on them (like I would have had a chance). So with the pressure off, I could talk - on their choice of topic, without embarassment, when they wanted to talk. And I could listen too. Listening was even easier.<P>As a result, I had a lot of friends who were girls - most of the girls at school, in fact. Not many guy friends, though - the jocks decided that since I hung around with girls and didn't move on them, I had to be gay. (Odd how no girl ever made that mistake, neh?) Needless to say, school wasn't much fun.<P>Now, one of my neighbors, a few doors down the street, happened to be just about the prettiest girl in school - and a good friend. Not best friends, but we talked regularly. I knew things about her that no other guy knew - her tastes, some of her dreams, what she looked for in a guy (no comment), and the fact that she had a brain.<P>One day while I was doing some yardwork, she came over. Brought me a glass of water, and said she needed to talk when I was done. I could see she was a bit upset, so I agreed - told her I'd be down when I finished and got cleaned up.<P>So, I walked down to her house - she didn't want to be cooped up. We walked down to the local park, where we found a secluded bench, and I proceeded to listen.<P>It seems her steady had been pressuring her, and when she refused him, he dumped her - hard. She was more upset than I'd thought (she was a great actress - she's in theatre now) and she really needed a sympathetic ear. Which I happily lent to her. Eventually, she got things straightened around in her head enough to cope, and we headed back to her place - only to get caught halfway there in a freezing rainstorm. We got back to her place and she insisted I come in and dry off - not that I was going to argue. While I was towelling off, we kept talking, and she started changing her clothes.<P>Now, I really wasn't certain what she was thinking. I mean, she wasn't doing it to be seductive. It was like she knew I was there to talk to, but otherwise I wasn't there. So I decided the polite thing to do was to just 'not see anything'. Like I said, she was a good friend.<P>Well, apparently she hadn't told me everything yet. It turns out that the guy had really done a number on her - you know the type. "Since you won't do what I want, you're not GOOD enough for me!" Garbage of that type. She'd been stewing about this for four or five days, and it had really set in deep - she was working her way into a bad depression.<P>So I opened my big mouth. Five little words. "You know he's absolutely wrong."<P>It was like a switch had been tripped - now she realized I was actually there. And she was all but naked. In her room. She froze, and started to panic. So I had to do something.<P>I grabbed her hand and pulled her down to sit next to me on her bed. I told her just what I thought of his opinions, and his right to hold them, and him. I finally told her just where I thought she was making her mistakes when she picked guys. I told her what _I_ thought of her. And I told her she needed to look for better guys than she'd been settling for. <P>This is how I know how hard that kind of focus is - my eyes never once left hers. And yes, I wanted to look so bad I could taste it. But this was too important - to her, and to me.<P>She just collapsed. Dead weight on my shoulder, and crying her eyes out. I let her cry until it was all gone (twenty minutes? thirty? I don't know), and then we got to the real talk. AFTER I got her to put on a robe.<P>Afterward, she told me she was just glad her mother hadn't come in - she wouldn't have wanted to explain the situation. I didn't have the heart to tell her, but her mom DID look in us - and decided to leave. (Her mom did tell her later. After questioning me about it - nothing hostile, she just wanted to be sure her little girl was all right.) We came out of it better friends than before, and were steadies for a while. She's moved on since then, got an acting career, got married, but we're still friends. <P>And I wouldn't change any of it.
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Postby ollie on Tue Aug 21, 2001 3:49 am

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by DragonFlare:
<B>I think it's best he not look down. For the sake of everything. If he did the mood would be worse.. and then what he said would not hold true.. about slowing down the relationship. <P></B><HR></BLOCKQUOTE><P>sunglasses my friend, sunglasses<P>yes i know it was just raining, and he's now indoors, but that just adds to teh layer of cool (and freedom) that sunglasses give you<P><P>------------------
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Postby Ninth Signal on Tue Aug 21, 2001 6:04 am

Both impressive and touching. You're lucky to not only have a strong will but to be able to be a good friend.
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Postby David Adrian on Tue Aug 21, 2001 6:45 am

She was special to me. Still is.
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