Choose your own adventure: CLT edition.

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Choose your own adventure: CLT edition.

Postby cheeselovingtree on Mon Dec 01, 2008 12:16 pm

A similar thread was made on another forum I go to. As an experiment, I want to see the different direction you guys take it in. Just suggest an action and I will try and do all of them. However, I still do a bit of railroading. Actions can be as mad and outlandish as possible.
Your eyes open slowly, seemingly against your will, exposing an inky blackness all too similar to that which was under your lids a moment ago.

Your eyes slowly adjust to the feeble light, you follow the light to it's source: An ancient fireplace containing the smoldering embers of a fire from many hours ago. You sit upright, fighting the swirling sickening sensation as the blood flows from your head. You look around and take stock of the room:

You are sitting in a large canopy bed, a sleeping figure lays beside you, a shock of golden hair flowing down her bare back. The corners of the room are not penetrated by the feeble light, but you can make out the edges of a large tapestry on the opposite wall. There is a solid oaken door to beside the tapestry, yellow light is visible through the crack on the bottom of the door. You can just make out the edges of another door directly to the right of the bed. There is a Fire Poker beside the fireplace. A Nightstand With a Single Small Drawer is adjacent to the bed. A Single Candlestick sits atop it.
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Re: Choose your own adventure: CLT edition.

Postby Fulgrymm on Mon Dec 01, 2008 2:08 pm

Begin sexing the sleeping woman.
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Re: Choose your own adventure: CLT edition.

Postby cheeselovingtree on Mon Dec 01, 2008 2:44 pm

You think that now would be a good time to fuck the sleeping woman while she's still here. As soon as the thought springs to your mind your penis seems to agree, and soon you're kissing her thighs in an effort to wake her up.
No effect.
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Re: Choose your own adventure: CLT edition.

Postby ed atiln on Mon Dec 01, 2008 3:53 pm

Oh right, I should update that thread of mine with that pink thing.

Choose your adventure =/= Interactive fiction
Especially not an erotic one. :smug:

Man erotic Choose your adventure would suck...
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Re: Choose your own adventure: CLT edition.

Postby cheeselovingtree on Mon Dec 01, 2008 4:20 pm

GIVE ME ACTIONS TO PERFORM
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Re: Choose your own adventure: CLT edition.

Postby Lone Wolf01 on Mon Dec 01, 2008 4:43 pm

Give up sexing the woman and listen for any voices on the other side of the door.
EDIT: The one beside the tapestry, with the light.
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It's already tomorrow in Australia.
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Re: Choose your own adventure: CLT edition.

Postby Cheshy458 on Mon Dec 01, 2008 5:38 pm

Take the candle stick, bludgeon the woman to death with it and retrieve the key in her intestines. Jigsaw commands it.
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Re: Choose your own adventure: CLT edition.

Postby cheeselovingtree on Mon Dec 01, 2008 6:35 pm

Realising the dumb bitch isn't going to wake up, You get out of bed. You realise you aren't wearing any clothes, but don't seem to care. You put your ear to the tapestry door and hear naught but the sounds of the forest. It's cold, and you tiptoe back to the bed. You look at the woman, and your sexual frustration suddenly peaks into a fit of rage. You grab the candlestick and beat the woman in an attempt to wake her up. At first she is unbelievably still asleep but by the time she wakes up you don't care. Bloodlust has put a horrifying, curling smile on your face and as flecks of red fly about the room the golden candle becomes a terrible crimson. You set the candlestick back on the table and start pummeling her with your fists. At this point, she has become silent. your knuckles are now a matching crimson to the candlestick. Sadly, there is no key in her intestines. You are disappointed. Oh wait, there's the key there on the bedside table. You pause and look at the woman once more. Memory comes flowing back.

A log cabin. Her hair flows down her bridal dress as you carry her over the threshold. You feel optemism- The future is bright.

You gape in horror. Tears escape your distraught eyes, as you realise you have just killed your own wife. This is the worst honeymoon ever!

From deep within the forest comes an unnatural howl, a deep guttural roar. No time to think about her now, something's up.
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Re: Choose your own adventure: CLT edition.

Postby Fulgrymm on Mon Dec 01, 2008 7:10 pm

First order of business, put some damn clothes on. Preferably something that is or can be used as armor.
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Re: Choose your own adventure: CLT edition.

Postby Dawlish on Mon Dec 01, 2008 8:33 pm

Killed my wife?! Blasphemy! I go back in time!
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Re: Choose your own adventure: CLT edition.

Postby cheeselovingtree on Tue Dec 02, 2008 6:15 am

You briefly consider the possibility of going back in time, but quickly discard this idea. You wonder briefly if you were a retard in a previous life.
What should you wear for armour? you don't see any clothing in the room. Maybe you should look around.
Last edited by cheeselovingtree on Tue Dec 02, 2008 8:08 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Choose your own adventure: CLT edition.

Postby Whatisthemeanin on Tue Dec 02, 2008 7:33 am

You need to have the lingo! Discard the thought.

Anyway, why don't we go outside into the forest and kill that thing which howls and wear it's fur as armor?
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Re: Choose your own adventure: CLT edition.

Postby Fulgrymm on Tue Dec 02, 2008 5:36 pm

That was my line of thought, but I had figured it would be more prudent to put on some clothing first, since apparently it's cold here and I'd rather not go out to kill something with my shriveled wang hanging out. But hey, if you're good to go as is, it's fine by me.
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Re: Choose your own adventure: CLT edition.

Postby cheeselovingtree on Tue Dec 02, 2008 7:34 pm

You look down at your shrivelled wang and find find it suitable for running around in a forest. So you leave, without looking for clothes or taking any weapons. The door creaks open and a man dressed in camoflage gear looks blankly ahead. He is armed with a weapon, and has not seen you.
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Re: Choose your own adventure: CLT edition.

Postby Fulgrymm on Tue Dec 02, 2008 10:05 pm

AWESOME. Kay, kill the guy and nick his gear, Fallout 3 style. That should give us a favourable position with which to start this grand adventure.
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Re: Choose your own adventure: CLT edition.

Postby cheeselovingtree on Wed Dec 03, 2008 11:10 am

A mighty, guttural roar escapes from your throat as you charge the man, naked, holding your bloody fists in the air. The man sees you coming, and for a second you see a glint of recognition in his eyes before his expression is replaced by one of fear. He fires wildly, missing by a wide margin, before screaming "YOU'RE ONE OF THOSE-" He never finishes though, as you decend upon him, pounding him over and over with your ruby knuckles. Teeth fly. He is winded. He tries to fight back but it is too late. You are on top of him. The cold bites at you but you don't notice. His cries for help and for you to stop go unheeded. Soon, he stops twitching, and you stand up. You dress yourself in his clothes and take his weapon. The clip is half empty. You look at the dead naked man, and suddenly a flash of memory comes to you.

The stage is cold but the night is young. In the front row, theDEAD NAKED MURDEREDBaron is the first to clap as you enter. If it wasn't for him You wouldn't have this acting job. Or Peggy, in fact.

Fuck, you just killed your best friend, Baron von dickfiend!
You're on a fucking roll, aren't you? You curse your stupidity. What are you going to do for an encore, shoot your own grandmother? Geez.
Oh well. You look at your weapon. An mp5. It is miraculously completely clean, unlike the gore-splattered garments you now clothe yourself in.
It's beautiful. There Is another roar from the belly of the forest. For any man, this roar would mean brown trousers time, but not for you. You have killed your wife and your best friend. Chances are high that you have nothing left to lose.
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Re: Choose your own adventure: CLT edition.

Postby Cheshy458 on Wed Dec 03, 2008 1:11 pm

Can we have a look at the tapestry? And also just possibly stop being such a homicidal dick face.
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Re: Choose your own adventure: CLT edition.

Postby ed atiln on Wed Dec 03, 2008 1:38 pm

Let's kill that beast that will in four posts turn out to be our dog, possibly one who saved our life two or three times.

We could have CLT writing erotic fiction for us and we blew it. :gonk:
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Re: Choose your own adventure: CLT edition.

Postby Fulgrymm on Wed Dec 03, 2008 3:31 pm

Well, it wasn't for a lack of trying. At least, not on my part. Oh well, this is turning out to be pretty fucking hilarious anyway.
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Re: Choose your own adventure: CLT edition.

Postby cheeselovingtree on Thu Dec 11, 2008 11:31 am

You decide to go in and check out the tapestry. You scrabble at the end, and it lands on your head with a dull flump. There is a wardrobe beneath it. You decide to fashion the tapestry into a toga of sorts. It gives you a feeling of royalty.
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Re: Choose your own adventure: CLT edition.

Postby Cheshy458 on Wed Jan 28, 2009 4:05 pm

Right, now let's open the wardrobe.

You thought we'd forgotten, CLT my boy.
Well, we had.
But we remembered. :smug:
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His name is Palamag and he is kick your butt.
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Re: Choose your own adventure: CLT edition.

Postby Fulgrymm on Wed Jan 28, 2009 4:51 pm

I'll take your smug and raise you two. :smug: :smug:
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Re: Choose your own adventure: CLT edition.

Postby Whatisthemeanin on Thu Jan 29, 2009 7:57 am

I take your smugs and raise to 3 :smug: :smug: :smug:
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Re: Choose your own adventure: CLT edition.

Postby Cheshy458 on Thu Jan 29, 2009 8:09 am

Whatisthemeanin wrote:I take your smugs and raise to 3 :smug: :smug: :smug:

Hey. Shut the hell up.
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His name is Palamag and he is kick your butt.
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Re: Choose your own adventure: CLT edition.

Postby Whatisthemeanin on Thu Jan 29, 2009 1:27 pm

Cheshy458 wrote:
Whatisthemeanin wrote:I take your smugs and raise to 3 :smug: :smug: :smug:

Hey. Shut the hell up.

You shut up.
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