Canadian Update

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Postby NumbVox on Fri Nov 09, 2007 6:27 am

DUN DUN DUN!
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Postby Jeremy_I_Am on Sat Nov 10, 2007 8:07 am

The winner of the Saskatchewan provincial election: Brad Wall, leader of the Saskatchewan Party, composed in 1997 of the remains of the corruption-riddled Conservative Party.

As of Jan 1, prominent lawyer Hubert Lacroix will become the new president of the state-run Canadian Broadcasting Corporation.

The federal NDP have introduced a motion to attatch a referendum to the next election on whether or not to abolish the Senate. The Bloc and Conservatives are "favourably receptive" of the bill.

Finally, Montreal artist Francois Yo Gourt has re-founded the Rhinoceros Party, originally founded in 1963 with an election platform that included repealing the law of gravity, putting steroids in the drinking water and moving the Rocky Mountains one foot to the right. The Rhinoceros Party was killed by a 1993 electoral law that essentially required political parties to put up a $50,000 deposit. The law was struck down by the supreme court in 2003.
And there you have it.
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Postby Jeremy_I_Am on Tue Nov 20, 2007 10:32 am

The Latest Scandal: the Mulroney-Schreiber Affair

Lobbyist Karlheinz Schreiber, to be extradited to Germany for charges of bribery that led to the collapse of the government of Helmut Kohl, has charged that former prime minister Brian Mulroney took $300,000 in slush money in a web of corruption involving Liberals and Conservatives in the late 80s and early 90s, culminating in the purchase by Air Canada of $3 billion worth of airplanes from Airbus, Schreiber's client. Prime Minister Harper has appointed an inquiry led by University of Waterloo president David Johnson to investigate the matter.
And there you have it.
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Postby Jeremy_I_Am on Wed Nov 28, 2007 9:22 am

The Saskatchewan Roughriders defeated the Winnipeg Blue Bombers on Sunday to win the Canadian Football League championship, the Grey Cup.

Sadly, Antonio Lamer, the 16th Chief Justice of the Supreme Court of Canada, has died. Lamer, 73, was appointed to the court in 1980 and was Chief Justice from 1990 to 2000.
And there you have it.
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Image3395 points--2009/1/23

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Postby Jeremy_I_Am on Fri Dec 07, 2007 10:06 am

Karlheinz Schreiber is testifying before the House ethics committee. The revelations include that the $300,000 he gave to Brian Mulroney had nothing to do with the Airbus deal and that he gave $30,000 to the April 1993 Progressive Conservative leadership campaign of Jean Charest, who is currently the premier of Quebec.

Some deaths:

Noval Morrisseau, the "Picasso of the North". Known for his psychadelic Native-themed paintings; he has been exhibited at the Louvre.

Jacques Hebert, senator who founded youth program Katimavik.

Alcide Yelle, only Mountie ever punished for spying on seperatists (6 mo. probation)

James Barber, celebrity chef.
Last edited by Jeremy_I_Am on Sun Mar 16, 2008 8:32 am, edited 1 time in total.
And there you have it.
My webcomic: Madly Off in Some Directions

Image3395 points--2009/1/23

"The limits of my language are the limits of my world." ~Ludwig Wittgenstein

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Postby Jeremy_I_Am on Fri Dec 14, 2007 9:44 am

Larry O'Brien, mayor of Ottawa, charged under sections 121(1)(d) and 125 (a) of the criminal code for bribing a man with the promise of a job on the Parole Board of Canada in return for not running against him.

R. William Pickton, pig farmer from Port Coquitlam, BC, convicted of 6 counts of 2nd degree murder of Vancouver prostitutes, sentenced to life imprisonment. Faces 20 more murder charges.

Conrad, Lord Black, former press baron, sentenced in US to 78 months in jail for 3 counts of fraud and 1 count of obstruction of justice.

60% of hospitals worldwide were without a reliable source of radioactive materials for medical tests when the nuclear labratories at Chalk River, Ont., went offline for 2 weeks for safety upgrades. The labs were legislated back into action.

Liberal leader Dion tells his caucus to be ready for an election early as Feb.

The Toronto Stock Exchange (TSX) bought the Montreal stock exchange for $1.4 B
Last edited by Jeremy_I_Am on Sun Mar 16, 2008 8:30 am, edited 1 time in total.
And there you have it.
My webcomic: Madly Off in Some Directions

Image3395 points--2009/1/23

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Postby NumbVox on Fri Dec 14, 2007 4:29 pm

I always thought you were an idiot.

I just read the shit in your signature for the very first time, and now I'm pretty damn certain you're the very apex of idiocy.
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Postby Jeremy_I_Am on Sat Dec 29, 2007 3:24 pm

I shall restrain myself in answering that

The 4 remaining by-elections will be held March 17.

OBITUARIES

Gerald Le Dain, 83. Legal scholar and jurist. Dean of Osgoode Hall Law School 1967-72, Federal Court of Appeal 1975-84, Supreme Court 1984-88. Chair of the Royal Commission on the Use of Non-Medical Drugs (Le Dain Commission, 1969-73). The Commission's recommendation of the decriminalization of marijuana possession made Le Dain a stoner icon.

Oscar Peterson, 82. Jazz pianist. Born and raised in Montreal's black neighbourhood of Little Burgundy, he won 8 Grammys. Considered one of the gratest pianists of modern times, Peterson counted Ella Fitzgerald, Count Basie and Duke Ellington among his admirers.
And there you have it.
My webcomic: Madly Off in Some Directions

Image3395 points--2009/1/23

"The limits of my language are the limits of my world." ~Ludwig Wittgenstein

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Postby Jeremy_I_Am on Thu Jan 24, 2008 9:29 am

Latest Scandal: the Lunn-Keen Affair

Long story short, Natural Resources minister Gary Lunn fired president of the Canadian Nuclear Safety Commission Linda Keen for mishandling the Chalk River shutdown (see above). What started as a question of whether or not the facility had adequate backups has become an issue over bureaucrat independance.

Commission on the Future of the Afghanistan combat mission chaired by former deputy prime minister John Manley released a report saying Canadian forces need 1000 more NATO troops in Kandahar or the mission is doomed to fail. Yay for the US Marines!

Harper pledges $1 billion to ailing industrial sectors contingent on passage of budget. Provinces and Opposition agree: blackmail.
And there you have it.
My webcomic: Madly Off in Some Directions

Image3395 points--2009/1/23

"The limits of my language are the limits of my world." ~Ludwig Wittgenstein

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"I once killed a coyote with this key. It was a small coyote. It might have been a potato." ~Asok
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Postby Weez on Mon Jan 28, 2008 5:21 pm

So, a Canadian and an American are sitting at a bar chatting, after they got to know each other a bit the Canadian asks the American, what do you guys really think of us Canadians? To which he replies, we don
Victory is certain this much is certan and if not you can always start the video game over.
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Postby Jeremy_I_Am on Sat Feb 09, 2008 12:12 pm

Cabinet minister John Baird to be probed by Commons committe for illicitly influencing 2006 Ottawa municipal election

Alberta premier Edward Stelmach calls provincial election for March 4.

$1B aid package disassociated from budget

Robert Weaver, broadcaster and literary impresario extrordinaire, dead at 87.
And there you have it.
My webcomic: Madly Off in Some Directions

Image3395 points--2009/1/23

"The limits of my language are the limits of my world." ~Ludwig Wittgenstein

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Re: Canadian Update

Postby Jeremy_I_Am on Sun Mar 16, 2008 8:29 am

Progessive Conservatives under Ed Stelmach whomp the ass of Liberals under Kevin Taft in Alberta's provincial election.
PC 72
Lib 9
NDP 2
The PCs have ruled Alberta Continuously since 1971.

Budget: $2.4 billion surplus & provisions for the creation of a $5000/yr tax free savings account.

Afghanistan: combat to Feb. 2009, training Afghan forces 09-11, pullout Mar-Sep 2011.

Blind blues guitarist Jeff Healey dead of cancer at 41.

PM Press secretary Dmitri Soudas has been holding meetings with civil servants to discuss a lawsuit by Montreal developers, which is bad.

In May 2005, 2 top Tories tried to bribe dying Independant MP Chuck Cadman with a $1M insurance policy to defeat the Martin government. He refused the offer.

Movement afoot to rename Montreal subway Station Lionel-Groulx after late jazz pianist Oscar Peterson.

Bloc MP Maka Kotto (Saint-Lambert) & Liberal MP Lucienne Robillard (Westmount--Ville-Marie) have resigned from Parliament.

Conservative 126
Liberal 94
Bloc 48
NDP 30
Ind 4
Vacant 6
TOTAL 308
Last edited by Jeremy_I_Am on Sun Apr 13, 2008 4:52 am, edited 1 time in total.
And there you have it.
My webcomic: Madly Off in Some Directions

Image3395 points--2009/1/23

"The limits of my language are the limits of my world." ~Ludwig Wittgenstein

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"I once killed a coyote with this key. It was a small coyote. It might have been a potato." ~Asok
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question

Postby RevSam on Wed Mar 19, 2008 4:55 pm

what is the deal with this thread
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Re: Canadian Update

Postby Jeremy_I_Am on Sat Mar 29, 2008 10:38 am

Results of by-elections:

Toronto Centre: Liberal Bob Rae
Willowdale: Liberal Martha Hall Findlay
Vancouver Quadra: Liberal Joyce Murray
Desnethe--Missinippi--Churchill River: Conservative Rob Clarke

Conservative 127
Liberal 97
Bloc 48
NDP 30
Ind 4
Vacant 2
TOTAL 308

A bill has been proposed to give greater powers to the Minister of Citizenship and Immigration to pick and choose who gets to come to this country. Likely to meet opposition.
And there you have it.
My webcomic: Madly Off in Some Directions

Image3395 points--2009/1/23

"The limits of my language are the limits of my world." ~Ludwig Wittgenstein

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"I once killed a coyote with this key. It was a small coyote. It might have been a potato." ~Asok
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Re: Canadian Update

Postby Jeremy_I_Am on Sat Apr 12, 2008 1:30 pm

Supreme Court justice Michel Bastarache to retire on 30 June

Female pioneer in public life Beryl Plumptre dead at 99. Most prominently, Plumptre was chair of the Food Prices Review Board in the 1970s.

NDP MP Pat Martin has introduced a bill to abolish the penny.
And there you have it.
My webcomic: Madly Off in Some Directions

Image3395 points--2009/1/23

"The limits of my language are the limits of my world." ~Ludwig Wittgenstein

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"I once killed a coyote with this key. It was a small coyote. It might have been a potato." ~Asok
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Re: Canadian Update

Postby Jeremy_I_Am on Sun Apr 13, 2008 4:39 am

Two of the greatest Canadian TV comedies are slated to retire:

1. CTV's Corner Gas, about the residents of the small town of Dog River, Saskatchewan. The most commercially successful comedy in Canadian history, series creator and star Brent Butt has announced it will end after its sixth season ends in 2009.

2. CBC's The Royal Canadian Air Farce, a popular satirical sketch comedy, will end after the finale of the 16th season, New Year's Eve 2008. The Air Farce troupe was founded on CBC Radio in 1973, by The Jest Society (CBC Radio, 1970-73) alumni Don Ferguson, Roger Abbott, Luba Goy, and Dave Broadfoot, who joined writers Gord Holtham and Rick Olsen and writer-performer John Morgan. They had a NYE TV special in 1982, followed by a few more specials throughout the 1980s. Broadfoot retired in 1988. In October 1993, the Air Farce began its TV series. The radio series ended in 1997. In 1998, Abbott, Ferguson, Goy and Morgan were awarded the Governor-General's Award for Lifetime Achievement in the Performing Arts. Morgan retired in 2000 and died in 2003. In 2002, Jessica Holmes joine the cast, followed by Craig Lauzon and Alan Park in 2004 and Penelope Corrin in 2007, bringing the cast to seven.
And there you have it.
My webcomic: Madly Off in Some Directions

Image3395 points--2009/1/23

"The limits of my language are the limits of my world." ~Ludwig Wittgenstein

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"I once killed a coyote with this key. It was a small coyote. It might have been a potato." ~Asok
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Re: Canadian Update

Postby Jeremy_I_Am on Sat May 03, 2008 11:56 am

"We are not another government service. We are the Canadian Armed Forces, and our job is to kill people."

~General Rick Hillier, chief of Defence Staff and the greatest general Canada's had in decades, who is retiring as of July 1. Among those expected to replace him:
+Vice-CDS Lt.-Gen. Walt Natynczyk
+Army commander Lt.-Gen. Andrew Leslie
+Navy commander Vice-Adm. Drew Robertson
+Air Force commander Lt.-Gen. Angus Watt
+Canadian Expeditionary Force commander Lt.-Gen.Michel Gauthier

In Quebec, the grave of former PM Pierre Trudeau was vandalised

Elections Canada got the RCMP to conduct an armed raid on Conservative party HQ to find evidence of indirect violations of election financing law.

Rogers communications will be making the iPhone available in Canada later this year

A video from 1991 has surfaced in which a young Saskatchewan staffer named Tom Lukiwski, possibly drunk, slurred gays.
He is now the MP for Regina--Lumsden--Lake Centre.
And there you have it.
My webcomic: Madly Off in Some Directions

Image3395 points--2009/1/23

"The limits of my language are the limits of my world." ~Ludwig Wittgenstein

Image

"I once killed a coyote with this key. It was a small coyote. It might have been a potato." ~Asok
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Re: Canadian Update

Postby Jeremy_I_Am on Sun May 04, 2008 12:09 pm

Liberal MP Brenda Chamberlain (Guelph) has retired.
Conservative127
Liberal 96
Bloc 48
NDP 30
Ind 4
Vacant 3
And there you have it.
My webcomic: Madly Off in Some Directions

Image3395 points--2009/1/23

"The limits of my language are the limits of my world." ~Ludwig Wittgenstein

Image

"I once killed a coyote with this key. It was a small coyote. It might have been a potato." ~Asok
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Re: Canadian Update

Postby RevSam on Mon May 05, 2008 7:26 am

NOBODY CARES/READS THIS THREAD
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PS

Postby RevSam on Mon May 05, 2008 7:28 am

hey no one except jeremy-i-am post in the next page of this thread ok
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Re: Canadian Update

Postby J. on Mon May 05, 2008 2:58 pm

hey no one post in this thread ok
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Re: Canadian Update

Postby RevSam on Tue May 06, 2008 6:30 am

J. wrote:hey no one post in this thread ok

FUKKKIN GODDAMN IT
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Re: Canadian Update

Postby J. on Tue May 06, 2008 7:47 pm

RevSam wrote:
J. wrote:hey no one post in this thread ok

FUKKKIN GODDAMN IT


FUKKKIN GODDAMN IT
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Re: Canadian Update

Postby RevSam on Wed May 07, 2008 7:42 am

J. wrote:
RevSam wrote:
J. wrote:hey no one post in this thread ok

FUKKKIN GODDAMN IT


FUKKKIN GODDAMN IT
FUCK THIS NOISE I'M OUTTA HERE
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Re: Canadian Update

Postby Acid Rain on Wed May 07, 2008 1:52 pm

read this you nearsided bastards
SPOILERS:fyyff

:D :) :( :o :-? 8) :lol: :x :P :oops: :cry: :evil: :roll: :wink: :evilgrin: :nervous: :shifty: :smug: :grumble: :-| :okthen: :sleep: :rootbeer: :tfgun: :gonk:
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