Lol, Omeg@! I guess we ought to do it again, just because. Ah, Christmas! I got myself a new Keenspot account, because I haven't been able to figure out how to log in for many months! (I'd have gotten it sooner if the registration page wasn't messed up.) So now, Skippy the Neandert[h]al is now Dr. Nociceptor!
This year, not only am I NOT snowed in, but there are presents under where the Christmas tree was at the beginning of December!
But wait... where did the tree go? That's a fun story! And I don't even have to make any of it up!
Basically, we packed it up for our scary roommate and his psychobitch girlfriend, both of whom agreed to leave after she beat him up and called the cops on him for beating HER up! She was the one to go to jail, luckily, and when she came back, she claimed not to remember ever doing any of the things that got her arrested! She came back and was all like, "Babe, what happened to your face?"
They told us they had found a place to move into, and were packing up all their stuff to leave, and us Sane Roommates helped too, including dismantling the tree so they could take it with them. We gave them back their rent for the rest of the month, they rented a U-Haul moving truck, got ready to load up... and then... Something Completely Different!
Instead of loading up the truck, there was a huge crapstorm for reasons I still dont' understand, and the guy called the cops on us, claiming we were throwing them out on the street and they had no place to go! It makes no sense! He comes home with a U-Haul truck and then says he has no place to take it! Huh?
The cops came and asked about why they rented a U-Haul if they weren't planning to use it. They couldn't figure that one out, and neither can anyone else! Then, I overheard them planning to steal something of ours to get back at us (for what, I might ask?), so we put all our stuff into our rooms and attached locks to the doors!
I don't get it! He's especially pissed at my fiance, who really helped make sure he wasn't arrested for his girlfriend's crap, helped him get a restaurant management job, a car to drive there, a driver's license so he could drive said car, even a TV cooking show, The Angry Chef (scheduled for January)! A week before, he shook my fiance's hand, saying "You are the finest man alive" but that night he was raging around the house, calling him a loser! I think the chef has some anger management problems.
Plus, psychobitch's every comment is rude if not hateful. She's even starting to scream at me, and I cannot figure out why! I've been the most careful not to ever piss her off, I've consoled her when she was upset after pulling her crap on other people, I've joked with her, etc, and I've never been rude to her!
And, the icing on the cake... after showing that I care about her and her future in her new apartment, I told her that I'm getting kicked out of my house (and didn't add that it was because of HER CRAP), and she just rolled her eyes and said, "It sucks to be you!"
JUST LIKE THAT! It's like, 'Now that I have a place to live, I don't give a crap! Have fun at the homeless shelter this Christmas!'
Well, I'm not really getting kicked out, that was just a fake eviction notice over all the domestic disturbances to get them to STOP BEING PISSED AT US, but I might have to move out anyway because their squatting has prevented us from moving in new roommates, and so far Us Sane Roommates are being denied getting a new house.
Sorry, I've been saving that up for some time. Here's hoping I get to live in my nice house for at least a little longer without them and their crap, not to mention, their obnoxiously loud, noise-polluting fish tank that assaults me every time I go into the living room, which is why I've never enjoyed our living room despite its being the best living room ever, with the best view ever! Sometimes I turn it off, but if I forget to turn it back on, it's curtains!
The fish tank is still here, too, they're supposed to have been gone by today but they aren't. RRRRGH!
Where's a good banishing spell when I need one? Frankly, I really think they'd be more at home in a hoary netherworld.
Sigh. Does anyone remember back in 2005 when I was here and freaking out because the bomb squad was blowing stuff up outside my window? Well, the insanity has been pretty much at that same explosive level ever since then, and I don't see any end to it anytime soon. We've been ripped off and robbed by so many people, even after we saved one of them from the SWAT team -- word of advice: if you're shooting a music video and you hear gun shots, don't stick around! Apparently, camera equipment looks like weaponry.
We even had a roommate who splashed bottles of his own urine ALL OVER the house in huge puddles RIGHT BEFORE the landlord came over, which I took a lot of abuse for because it was first assumed that somehow my cats had managed to pee huge three foot puddles of human-smelling urine ALL OVER the downstairs and the upstairs living room furniture, and over many days without anyone noticing. I was called a 'filthy slob' and punished so severely for it (especially by scary-guy) that I actually believed it was true... until he found a bottle of pee and put two and two together.
The last house we were in was a constant construction zone nightmare, and we were finally kicked out because it was condemned and our crazy landlady refused to let us do anything about it. Not only that, but she constantly told the workers lies about us being crack dealers who had actually caused the problems with the house. It was at least as bad as the place we had before, despite being a crime-ridden crackhouse with fights going on every night, gunshots, break-ins, etc.
Basically, I've learned that most people I am likely to meet are only nice on the surface, if that. We've had so many crazy roommates/Lou Ryan Productions team members with absurd accusations, and most of them turned out to be addicted to really nasty drugs. Not to mention, we're now also trying to rid ourselves of an alcoholic roommate who is usually so drunk he doesn't understand why the rest of us find him so obnoxious. As for my sane roommate, his mom just died and he's being raped by the mortuary, and that's not helping.
OKAY, ENOUGH OF THAT! Yes, my life's been a constant crap-storm since I was three years old and if it were only marketable in some way, I'd be rich by now! It just needs to have... happy stuff added to it so as not to make it such a downer!
Anyway, if anyone else in here who read this has not been having a good holiday season, please take comfort in the fact that poor Dr. Nociceptor, who's been out of evil work for YEARS, is probably going to have to find YET ANOTHER EVIL LAIR, and won't be hatching any plots anytime soon, and probably has it worse than you. How long has it been since I stole that lake in the Andes?
Well, looks like I have a visitor, from Japan, even! Maybe he'll cheer me up! Got to go...
Someday, you'll be bending to my will!