[S.T.O.R.Y. 2/25/02] Speculation Trap - Randal and the job

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[S.T.O.R.Y. 2/25/02] Speculation Trap - Randal and the job

Postby Chaos Priest on Mon Sep 29, 2008 7:57 pm

http://www.egscomics.com/d/20020225.html

Elliot was half asleep when he said it and probably had been dreaming about Clerks. He has not been shown to actually have a job, nor do we know if he really knows somebody named Randal.
...But hey, Elliot got that lighter from Silent Bob, so maybe EGS does take place in the View Askewniverse :shifty:

Anyway, what I would like to know is who Mr. Verres is worried about listening in on the conversation.
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Re: [S.T.O.R.Y. 2/25/02] Speculation Trap - Randal and the job

Postby The Old Hack on Mon Sep 29, 2008 8:37 pm

Chaos Priest wrote:Anyway, what I would like to know is who Mr. Verres is worried about listening in on the conversation.

Duh. Obviously he is worried about them[1] listening in.


[1]Possible definitions of them including but not limited to:

CIA
DIA
MI-5
KGB
GRU
GSA
NSA
NORAD
UPS
MI-6
GPU
MOSSAD
U.N.C.L.E.
MIB
MTV
S.H.I.E.L.D.
COBRA

...and many, many others.
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Re: [S.T.O.R.Y. 2/25/02] Speculation Trap - Randal and the job

Postby Dragonstar on Mon Sep 29, 2008 8:45 pm

The Old Hack wrote:
Chaos Priest wrote:Anyway, what I would like to know is who Mr. Verres is worried about listening in on the conversation.

Duh. Obviously he is worried about them[1] listening in.


[1]Possible definitions of them including but not limited to:

CIA
DIA
MI-5
KGB
GRU
GSA
NSA
NORAD
UPS
MI-6
GPU
MOSSAD
U.N.C.L.E.
MIB
MTV
S.H.I.E.L.D.
COBRA

...and many, many others.


It is obviously KAOS . . . Now, where's the Cone of Silence when you need it?
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Re: [S.T.O.R.Y. 2/25/02] Speculation Trap - Randal and the job

Postby Puffs on Mon Sep 29, 2008 11:57 pm

Don't forget DATS, D.O.L.L.Y., TR, NAMBLA, the other NAMBLA, HYPNOS, and the FCC.
Last edited by Puffs on Tue Sep 30, 2008 8:36 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: [S.T.O.R.Y. 2/25/02] Speculation Trap - Randal and the job

Postby The Old Hack on Tue Sep 30, 2008 1:38 am

Puffs wrote:Don't forget DATS, D.O.L.L.Y., TR, NAMBLA, the other NAMBLA, and the FCC.

I am kind of reminded of a roleplaying campaign (a very short one) which ended with the players (I was one of them) so royally buggering up a terrorism case we were trying to solve that the GM told us, "Okay, you guys blew this so big that you are now wanted by the CIA, the NSA, the FBI, the MI-5, the KGB and every single other organisation on the Earth that has a menacing acronym all in caps for a name." I commented, "Well, if NORAD is on that list, too, we're really screwed." The GM only grinned. I should have kept my big mouth shut. :o
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Re: [S.T.O.R.Y. 2/25/02] Speculation Trap - Randal and the job

Postby Xylric on Tue Sep 30, 2008 12:28 pm

The Old Hack wrote:
Puffs wrote:Don't forget DATS, D.O.L.L.Y., TR, NAMBLA, the other NAMBLA, and the FCC.

I am kind of reminded of a roleplaying campaign (a very short one) which ended with the players (I was one of them) so royally buggering up a terrorism case we were trying to solve that the GM told us, "Okay, you guys blew this so big that you are now wanted by the CIA, the NSA, the FBI, the MI-5, the KGB and every single other organisation on the Earth that has a menacing acronym all in caps for a name." I commented, "Well, if NORAD is on that list, too, we're really screwed." The GM only grinned. I should have kept my big mouth shut. :o


I has something very similar to that happen to me...

We won. :)
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Re: [S.T.O.R.Y. 2/25/02] Speculation Trap - Randal and the job

Postby Huzzus on Tue Sep 30, 2008 12:45 pm

Does not really care who is tapping the phone, I just care that I finally got this joke after reading it for the 18th time *facepalm*. I'm no good with jokes that just slide under the radar, if you will.
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Re: [S.T.O.R.Y. 2/25/02] Speculation Trap - Randal and the job

Postby Bickendan on Tue Sep 30, 2008 12:45 pm

The Old Hack wrote:
Puffs wrote:Don't forget DATS, D.O.L.L.Y., TR, NAMBLA, the other NAMBLA, and the FCC.

I am kind of reminded of a roleplaying campaign (a very short one) which ended with the players (I was one of them) so royally buggering up a terrorism case we were trying to solve that the GM told us, "Okay, you guys blew this so big that you are now wanted by the CIA, the NSA, the FBI, the MI-5, the KGB and every single other organisation on the Earth that has a menacing acronym all in caps for a name." I commented, "Well, if NORAD is on that list, too, we're really screwed." The GM only grinned. I should have kept my big mouth shut. :o

At least NASA wasn't pissed. Right?
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Re: [S.T.O.R.Y. 2/25/02] Speculation Trap - Randal and the job

Postby Puffs on Tue Sep 30, 2008 12:52 pm

The Old Hack wrote:
Puffs wrote:Don't forget DATS, D.O.L.L.Y., TR, NAMBLA, the other NAMBLA, and the FCC.

I am kind of reminded of a roleplaying campaign (a very short one) which ended with the players (I was one of them) so royally buggering up a terrorism case we were trying to solve that the GM told us, "Okay, you guys blew this so big that you are now wanted by the CIA, the NSA, the FBI, the MI-5, the KGB and every single other organisation on the Earth that has a menacing acronym all in caps for a name." I commented, "Well, if NORAD is on that list, too, we're really screwed." The GM only grinned. I should have kept my big mouth shut. :o


Well, assuming you're female, I have no idea what the other NAMBLA would want with you.
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Re: [S.T.O.R.Y. 2/25/02] Speculation Trap - Randal and the job

Postby Nightranger on Tue Sep 30, 2008 3:39 pm

title wrote:Oh, like your phone isn't?

Hmmmm...

*checks date of this comic*

Yep, it's after 9-11-2001, I live in America, so it probably is.

Hi government-type peoples who are probably reading this as I type it, while not themselves violating any laws thanks to the Uniting and Strengthening America by Providing Appropriate Tools Required to Intercept and Obstruct Terrorism Act!
MARTIN: What?
DANIEL: Okay. One, that's Star Trek; and two, it's ridiculous.
MARTIN: What's wrong with it?
CARTER: "The singularity is about to explode?"
MARTIN: Yes.
CARTER: Everything about that statement is wrong.
DANIEL: How exactly is having weapons at maximum going to help the situation?
MARTIN: The audience isn't going to know the difference. They love: "weapons at maximum."
MITCHELL: Never underestimate your audience. They're generally sensitive, intelligent people who respond positively to quality entertainment.
TEAL’C: I do not understand why everything in this script must inevitably explode.
MARTIN: Look, you guys may all know how things really work out there in the galaxy, but I know the film business. Explosions make great trailers. Simple fact. More explosions, better trailer. Better trailer, more viewers.


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Here's more proof.
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Re: [S.T.O.R.Y. 2/25/02] Speculation Trap - Randal and the job

Postby The Old Hack on Tue Sep 30, 2008 3:55 pm

Nightranger wrote:Hi government-type peoples who are probably reading this as I type it, while not themselves violating any laws thanks to the Uniting and Strengthening America by Providing Appropriate Tools Required to Intercept and Obstruct Terrorism Act!

How unfair! The rest of us have to wait until you hit the Submit button! :evil:

Bickendan wrote:At least NASA wasn't pissed. Right?

*scratches head* Actually, that might explain that astronaut death squad on our tails...
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Re: [S.T.O.R.Y. 2/25/02] Speculation Trap - Randal and the job

Postby Dragonstar on Tue Sep 30, 2008 4:52 pm

The Old Hack wrote:
Nightranger wrote:Hi government-type peoples who are probably reading this as I type it, while not themselves violating any laws thanks to the Uniting and Strengthening America by Providing Appropriate Tools Required to Intercept and Obstruct Terrorism Act!

How unfair! The rest of us have to wait until you hit the Submit button! :evil:

Bickendan wrote:At least NASA wasn't pissed. Right?

*scratches head* Actually, that might explain that astronaut death squad on our tails...



Careful, Buzz Aldrin has a strong punch!
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Re: [S.T.O.R.Y. 2/25/02] Speculation Trap - Randal and the job

Postby kyevan on Fri Oct 03, 2008 1:06 pm

I'd be more worried about the PETA "Meat Preparation Specialists"...
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Re: [S.T.O.R.Y. 2/25/02] Speculation Trap - Randal and the job

Postby Nightranger on Fri Oct 03, 2008 1:15 pm

Speaking of PETA, anyone else hear they're trying to get Ben & Jerry's to us human milk instead of cow milk?
MARTIN: What?
DANIEL: Okay. One, that's Star Trek; and two, it's ridiculous.
MARTIN: What's wrong with it?
CARTER: "The singularity is about to explode?"
MARTIN: Yes.
CARTER: Everything about that statement is wrong.
DANIEL: How exactly is having weapons at maximum going to help the situation?
MARTIN: The audience isn't going to know the difference. They love: "weapons at maximum."
MITCHELL: Never underestimate your audience. They're generally sensitive, intelligent people who respond positively to quality entertainment.
TEAL’C: I do not understand why everything in this script must inevitably explode.
MARTIN: Look, you guys may all know how things really work out there in the galaxy, but I know the film business. Explosions make great trailers. Simple fact. More explosions, better trailer. Better trailer, more viewers.


I have discovered that Death Note + Lucky Star = awsome.
Here's more proof.
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Re: [S.T.O.R.Y. 2/25/02] Speculation Trap - Randal and the job

Postby kyevan on Fri Oct 03, 2008 1:26 pm

Nightranger wrote:Speaking of PETA, anyone else hear they're trying to get Ben & Jerry's to us human milk instead of cow milk?

... Somehow, I don't see that flying.
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Re: [S.T.O.R.Y. 2/25/02] Speculation Trap - Randal and the job

Postby Chaos Priest on Fri Oct 03, 2008 1:33 pm

Yeah, I heard about that. Link to the story for the morbidly curious out there. I'm hoping that's just a shock tactic rather then a serious suggestion. Either way I don't think this is going to help accusations that they care more about animal life then human life.

Besides, how the heck could they do it anyway? I mean, just how many people would they have to hire as "milkmaids" to produce that much ice cream?
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Re: [S.T.O.R.Y. 2/25/02] Speculation Trap - Randal and the job

Postby Xylric on Fri Oct 03, 2008 3:32 pm

Chaos Priest wrote:Yeah, I heard about that. Link to the story for the morbidly curious out there. I'm hoping that's just a shock tactic rather then a serious suggestion. Either way I don't think this is going to help accusations that they care more about animal life then human life.

Besides, how the heck could they do it anyway? I mean, just how many people would they have to hire as "milkmaids" to produce that much ice cream?


Ah... so *that's* why Tedd designed the cow form....
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Re: [S.T.O.R.Y. 2/25/02] Speculation Trap - Randal and the job

Postby kyevan on Fri Oct 03, 2008 3:50 pm

Chaos Priest wrote:Yeah, I heard about that. Link to the story for the morbidly curious out there. I'm hoping that's just a shock tactic rather then a serious suggestion. Either way I don't think this is going to help accusations that they care more about animal life then human life.

Besides, how the heck could they do it anyway? I mean, just how many people would they have to hire as "milkmaids" to produce that much ice cream?

Yeah. I honestly don't have an issue with it being 'gross' or anything, I'm just thinking from a practical standpoint - humans don't produce nearly as much milk as cows, do they? Not to mention, one of the reasons they cite is that cows are impregnated every few months to insure constant milkability. Would they rather have humans forcefully impregnated every few months instead!? PETA does some good things, but then stupid shit like this comes out...
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Re: [S.T.O.R.Y. 2/25/02] Speculation Trap - Randal and the job

Postby Dragonstar on Fri Oct 03, 2008 5:22 pm

kyevan wrote:
Chaos Priest wrote:Yeah, I heard about that. Link to the story for the morbidly curious out there. I'm hoping that's just a shock tactic rather then a serious suggestion. Either way I don't think this is going to help accusations that they care more about animal life then human life.

Besides, how the heck could they do it anyway? I mean, just how many people would they have to hire as "milkmaids" to produce that much ice cream?

Yeah. I honestly don't have an issue with it being 'gross' or anything, I'm just thinking from a practical standpoint - humans don't produce nearly as much milk as cows, do they? Not to mention, one of the reasons they cite is that cows are impregnated every few months to insure constant milkability. Would they rather have humans forcefully impregnated every few months instead!? PETA does some good things, but then stupid shit like this comes out...



Humans can lactate without pregnancy. In fact, I believe nursemaids were originally named as such because they breast-fed the children of their employers.
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Re: [S.T.O.R.Y. 2/25/02] Speculation Trap - Randal and the job

Postby Man on the Moon on Fri Oct 03, 2008 5:55 pm

Dragonstar wrote:Careful, Buzz Aldrin has a strong punch!


Ah, that video always makes me laugh. You're welcome back anytime, Buzz. :lol:
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Re: [S.T.O.R.Y. 2/25/02] Speculation Trap - Randal and the job

Postby nitpicking on Fri Oct 03, 2008 6:21 pm

kyevan wrote: ...PETA does some good things...

No, they don't. Unless you mean "funding terrorism" or "killing lots of animals."

Dragonstar wrote:Humans can lactate without pregnancy. In fact, I believe nursemaids were originally named as such because they breast-fed the children of their employers.

Nursemaids aka "wet nurses" actually were lactating because they had given birth.
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Re: [S.T.O.R.Y. 2/25/02] Speculation Trap - Randal and the job

Postby Nightranger on Fri Oct 03, 2008 6:26 pm

kyevan wrote:
Chaos Priest wrote:Yeah, I heard about that. Link to the story for the morbidly curious out there. I'm hoping that's just a shock tactic rather then a serious suggestion. Either way I don't think this is going to help accusations that they care more about animal life then human life.

I agree with Chaos Priest here, about hoping that it's just a publicity stunt.


Now, personally, I think Ben and Jerry's should make a line of ice cream with cat-girl milk! :D
MARTIN: What?
DANIEL: Okay. One, that's Star Trek; and two, it's ridiculous.
MARTIN: What's wrong with it?
CARTER: "The singularity is about to explode?"
MARTIN: Yes.
CARTER: Everything about that statement is wrong.
DANIEL: How exactly is having weapons at maximum going to help the situation?
MARTIN: The audience isn't going to know the difference. They love: "weapons at maximum."
MITCHELL: Never underestimate your audience. They're generally sensitive, intelligent people who respond positively to quality entertainment.
TEAL’C: I do not understand why everything in this script must inevitably explode.
MARTIN: Look, you guys may all know how things really work out there in the galaxy, but I know the film business. Explosions make great trailers. Simple fact. More explosions, better trailer. Better trailer, more viewers.


I have discovered that Death Note + Lucky Star = awsome.
Here's more proof.
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Re: [S.T.O.R.Y. 2/25/02] Speculation Trap - Randal and the job

Postby Darekun on Fri Oct 03, 2008 7:43 pm

kyevan wrote:Yeah. I honestly don't have an issue with it being 'gross' or anything, I'm just thinking from a practical standpoint - humans don't produce nearly as much milk as cows, do they?

Certainly not modern dairy cows, which have been genetically engineered the slow way for massive milk production...

kyevan wrote:Not to mention, one of the reasons they cite is that cows are impregnated every few months to insure constant milkability. Would they rather have humans forcefully impregnated every few months instead!?


nitpicking wrote:
Dragonstar wrote:Humans can lactate without pregnancy. In fact, I believe nursemaids were originally named as such because they breast-fed the children of their employers.

Nursemaids aka "wet nurses" actually were lactating because they had given birth.

It's yet more complex than that :J Humans can't start lactating without pregnancy*, but they'll continue to lactate so long as they're nursed from. For a rather bizarre example, one study determined that traditional nursing accrues benefits for the child's health(as compared to weaning, formula and cow milk were excluded) remain statistically significant until the age of 13. Apparently, cows are different...
*Anecdotal evidence suggests pheromones and attempted nursing combined can induce lactation in a small fraction of humans, regardless of sex, but this remains anecdotal.

Personally, I think it's a publicity stunt, and don't really hope anything.
I am also reminded of this strip.
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Re: [S.T.O.R.Y. 2/25/02] Speculation Trap - Randal and the job

Postby Man on the Moon on Fri Oct 03, 2008 7:45 pm

Nightranger wrote:Now, personally, I think Ben and Jerry's should make a line of ice cream with cat-girl milk! :D


That would probably taste awful. I doubt there's a high fat content in catgirl milk.
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Re: [S.T.O.R.Y. 2/25/02] Speculation Trap - Randal and the job

Postby Nightranger on Fri Oct 03, 2008 8:45 pm

Perhaps, but--this being EGS--I just had to suggest it.
MARTIN: What?
DANIEL: Okay. One, that's Star Trek; and two, it's ridiculous.
MARTIN: What's wrong with it?
CARTER: "The singularity is about to explode?"
MARTIN: Yes.
CARTER: Everything about that statement is wrong.
DANIEL: How exactly is having weapons at maximum going to help the situation?
MARTIN: The audience isn't going to know the difference. They love: "weapons at maximum."
MITCHELL: Never underestimate your audience. They're generally sensitive, intelligent people who respond positively to quality entertainment.
TEAL’C: I do not understand why everything in this script must inevitably explode.
MARTIN: Look, you guys may all know how things really work out there in the galaxy, but I know the film business. Explosions make great trailers. Simple fact. More explosions, better trailer. Better trailer, more viewers.


I have discovered that Death Note + Lucky Star = awsome.
Here's more proof.
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