The Top Ten... (OT)

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The Top Ten... (OT)

Postby The Gneech on Wed Nov 05, 2003 6:46 am

Movie Hybrids Gneech Doesn't Want to See...

10.) To Live and Let Die in L.A.
A bleak story of drugs, crime, and corruption in MI6, with outrageous gadgets and a theme song by Paul McCartney.

9.) Episode I: The Phantom Creeps
Bela Lugosi and a robot with a flat butt easily conquer the galaxy 'cause the heroes are so dumb.

8.) BIG Trouble in Little China
Kurt Russell is magically transformed into Tom Hanks and has to go fight demons in San Francisco's Chinatown with his friend who owns a toy company. Oh, and Kim Catrall.

7.) Big Trouble in Little China
Tim Allen stars as a thinly-disguised Dave Barry and has to go fight demons in Miami's Chinatown while Patrick Warburton runs naked through an airport. Oh, and Kim Catrall.

6.) Three Men and a Babe
Tom Selleck, Steve Gutenberg, and Ted Danson find a talking pig left on their doorstep and learn lessons about live, love, and junk like that.

5.) A Room With a View to a Kill
A charming and elegant Victorian-era romance about Christopher Walken's plan to destroy Silicon Valley, unless Bond can overcome his awkward social inhibitions.

4.) Die Another Day the Earth Stood Still
Pierce Brosnan and a giant robot named Gort stop all technology on the face of the planet for an hour to teach Chinese extremists the value of peace. Last Bond joke, I promise.

3.) Twelve Iron Monkeys
Terry Gilliam directs this kung fu action tale about Bruce Willis being sent back in time to Imperial China to battle corrupt monks who want to spread a deadly virus. Look out for Bilbo Baggins playing a priest named Cornelius ... or was that a different movie?

2.) The Trouble With Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone
Alfred Hitchcock directs this magical tale of a dead young wizard, and the various people whose lives are touched on the day when they have to try to hide the body. This premise was successfully re-used later with Ray Milland as a dead alcoholic being put into funny situations in The Lost Weekend at Bernie's.

1.) Four Big Fat Greek Weddings and a Funeral
Hugh Grant ... oh forget it.

-The Gneech 8)
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Re: The Top Ten... (OT)

Postby Malignant_Slurpee on Wed Nov 05, 2003 8:03 am

The Gneech wrote:5.) A Room With a View to a Kill
A charming and elegant Victorian-era romance about Christopher Walken's plan to destroy Silicon Valley, unless Bond can overcome his awkward social inhibitions.


Reminds me of that one movie... ah yes... "The Room With a View of HELL... Staircase of Satan... Pond of Death"

You're always in here all the time wth the %@#&*^$ matches!
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Postby allan_ecker on Wed Nov 05, 2003 1:34 pm

How about:

Escape from LA Story:
Steve Martin's wacky romantic adventures in post-appocalyptic Los Angeles!

or

Liscence to Kill a Mockingbird
James Bond must protect civilization from the far-reaching reprocussions of a racially charged rape trial in a small southern town!

or

Father of the Bride of Frankenstein
Steve Martin's decomposing daughter is getting married to a stranger with a funny accent and a lab of horrors!

or

The Nightmare on Elm Street Before Christmas
Claymation Freddy's got to slash his way through a suburban town to save Christmas!
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Postby gatorman_295 on Wed Nov 05, 2003 3:35 pm

The Fox-Bow Incident*
In the Old West, Zorro must prevent three innocents from being lynched by an angry mob.

*If you don’t know why it’s called The Fox-Bow Incident , then you obviously don’t know your Spanish.
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Postby Malignant_Slurpee on Wed Nov 05, 2003 6:04 pm

allan_ecker wrote:How about:
Escape from LA Story:
Steve Martin's wacky romantic adventures in post-appocalyptic Los Angeles!


Hah... I wonder what the equinox scene would be like in that film.
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Postby The Gneech on Wed Nov 05, 2003 6:17 pm

Ten bonus points for Allan Ecker, two points each for using five of my favorite movies!

I'll let you speculate as to which five. :)

-The Gneech 8)
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Postby Kheetor84 on Wed Nov 05, 2003 7:16 pm

Oh god, parodies.... Don't get me started... I can't even stand parody fanfictions...
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Postby RandomScribe on Wed Nov 05, 2003 8:04 pm

Eh, I'm not very good at these, but I'll give it a shot...

Matchstick Men in Black: A pair of con artists make a fortune by convincing civilians that they need to be protected from an alien invasion...

Best in Show Boat: A documentary about a dog show held on a steamboat...

The Music Man of La Mancha: An idealistic instrument salesman must woo a librarian while battling windmills...

Lord of the Rings--Return of the King Kong: A giant ape rampages through Middle Earth. 'Nuff said.

Little Shop of Rocky Horror Picture Show?

Nah, I'm not even going to touch that one...

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Postby Nekomimikun on Wed Nov 05, 2003 8:51 pm

The Matrix







what?
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Postby trpeal on Thu Nov 06, 2003 6:02 pm

I'll try my hand at this....

Hang 'Em High Times -- Clint Eastwood and Cheech Marin chase down the vigilante group that falsely accused them of selling dimebags in the Old West.

Cannonball Run Lola Run -- Burt Reynolds and Franke Potente participate in an illegal cross-country foot race.

How Soylent Green Was My Valley -- In a turn of the century Welsh mining village, Charlton Heston investigates a murder and discovers what they really do with the canaries after they die.

I think I'll stop here.... :wink:
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Postby Won-Tolla on Thu Nov 06, 2003 10:34 pm

Duh, I guess you guys are more wellread (or whatever the movie equivalent is) than me. I can't think of a single pair of movies that I both know the plot of and that have a word in common.
Well, I could always make a desperate attempt to combine Blue Thunder and Blue Streak with Blues Brothers. Jake and Elwood get involved in the theft of a secret police helicopter and have to flee to Chicago? Nah...
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Postby Malignant_Slurpee on Thu Nov 06, 2003 10:54 pm

"My Dinner With Andre"

Wallace Shawn and Andre have a fancy dinner and mild chat about balancing balls on your nose, eating fish, and being a marine mammal.
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Postby Feyliya on Fri Nov 07, 2003 7:40 am

Won-Tolla wrote:Duh, I guess you guys are more wellread (or whatever the movie equivalent is) than me. I can't think of a single pair of movies that I both know the plot of and that have a word in common.
Well, I could always make a desperate attempt to combine Blue Thunder and Blue Streak with Blues Brothers. Jake and Elwood get involved in the theft of a secret police helicopter and have to flee to Chicago? Nah...


How about....::cue "The Big Rock-Candy Mountain"::
Blues Brothers Where Art Thou - Jake and Elwood escape from the Joliet chain gang and go in search of treasure, while cutting a hit record along the way.

(That was just TOO easy. Oh Brother Where Art Thou and Blues Brothers have soooooo many things in common.)

Hmm.....Let's try the James Bond Movies. (Minus Liscence to Kill. That's already been used.)

A Room With A View To A Kill? Night of the Living Daylights? To Sir From Russia With Love? Diamonds are Forever Young? Dr. No Dolittle? Live and Let Die Hard? The Man With The Golden Top Gun? Die Another Day in Paradise?

Can't think of any more. My mind has just gone blank.
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Re: The Top Ten... (OT)

Postby Feyliya on Fri Nov 07, 2003 7:44 am

The Gneech wrote:5.) A Room With a View to a Kill
A charming and elegant Victorian-era romance about Christopher Walken's plan to destroy Silicon Valley, unless Bond can overcome his awkward social inhibitions.


Whoopsie! The Gneech had that one before me!
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Postby Won-Tolla on Fri Nov 07, 2003 7:51 am

I was going to point that out; your second post seems to have slipped between the cracks. Well, this should shake it out.

In our first triple feature, Prince goes on a road trip with his autistic brother and revolutionizes the movie industry in

Singing In The Purple Rain Man
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Postby Won-Tolla on Fri Nov 07, 2003 8:12 am

Then there's a couple I *have* seen both of but still find hard to mix, even thought they have some similarities, because the characters kind of play opposite roles. I am of course talking of the animated musical

My Fair Lady and The Tramp

:roll:


Or how about a triple-whammy: A part-animated part-musical about two men who travelled deep into unknown lands where they got transformed into animals and one became ruler of a four-legged kingdom while the other became a teacher of his children.

The Man Who would Be the Lion King And I

Hmm, I've got three kings and two ladies. That's a full house! :D
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Postby Tiger_T on Fri Nov 07, 2003 10:19 am

How about Pokemon + Alien (don't know a smashing title for that).
Ash tries to catch the alien and become friends with it.
I choose YOU, Alien ^-^! ... He would win every match! :lol:
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Postby Tiger_T on Fri Nov 07, 2003 10:21 am

:evil: $%&// double posts :evil:
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Postby The Gneech on Fri Nov 07, 2003 10:36 am

Won-Tolla, you're making my brain hurt. ;)

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Postby Won-Tolla on Fri Nov 07, 2003 11:16 am

Tiger_T wrote:How about Pokemon + Alien (don't know a smashing title for that).


I've got the slogan:

"In space noone can hear you catch'em all."

*ducks and runs*
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Postby Won-Tolla on Fri Nov 07, 2003 11:24 am

A dying composer relates the story of his crazy rival who went to the Alps and ran afoul of a drooling, amicable St. Bernard.

Amadeus vs. Beethoven
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Postby allan_ecker on Fri Nov 07, 2003 3:16 pm

I really want to see My Fair Lady and the Tramp.

Father of the Runnaway Bride!
Steve Martin's Daughter's elaborate wedding gets even more stressful when she ditches Richard Gear at the altar!

Three to Tango and Cash
Pretty much self-explanitory.

Logan's Run Lola Run
Lola's mysterious ability to reverse time gives her three chances to escape the sandmen!

Thunderbaseketball
James Bond must deal with the madcap adventures of the creaters of southpark while saving the world!

How Stella Got the Emperor's New Groove Back
Not even gonna try to explain that one.

Star Wars: A New Hope Floats
Luke has tear-jerking difficulties growing up a poor farmer's son!

From HellRaiser
Jack the Ripper vs. ... that spikey dude!

Evil Dead: Army of the Ghost and the Darkness
Bruce Campbell vs. Undead Lions! Score!

Deepstar Six Impact
A meteor hits an underwater station which then gets attacked by a cambrian beast!

Star Wars: Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back
Jay and Silent Bob try to stop Darth Vader from making a movie about them! -guh-

Star Wars: Attack of the Killer Tomatoes
... twitch...

And of course:

As Good as it Gets Smart
Jack Nickleson plays an OCD-afflicted superspy out to get Maxwell Smart, assuming of course his penchant for put-downs doesn't get him into too much trouble!
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Postby trpeal on Fri Nov 07, 2003 5:50 pm

allan_ecker wrote:I really want to see My Fair Lady and the Tramp.

Me, too. It has interesting possibilities.... :wink:

Starship Troop Beverly Hills -- Shelley Long leads a volunteer detachment of powered infantry troopers (all of whom are girls between the ages of 8 and 13) from this wealthy California city to fight the Bugs and save Earth.

Shaft in the African Queen -- Richard Roundtree and Katherine Hepburn travel down the Ulanga River to Lake Tanganikya to destroy a modern-day slave ring run by the Kaiser.

RollerThunderball -- Bond must stop Jonathan E from scoring his last goal using a nuke that SPECTRE inserted into the game to destroy the Corporation.

The Truth About Cats & Reservoir Dogs -- Uma Thurman, Janeane Garafolo, and Harvey Keitel star in this mistaken-identity comedy centered around a bungled diamond heist. Ben Chaplin co-stars as Mr. Blonde.

Animal House on Haunted Hill -- The members of Delta Chi are offered $10000 each to spend one night in Vincent Price's house.

Undercover Brother Bear -- Ugh.

Malcom X Files -- I'm not going to touch this one....
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Postby Won-Tolla on Fri Nov 07, 2003 7:17 pm

How about mixing movies with TV series?

Peggy Sue got Married with Children
:o :o :o
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Postby DetailBearCA on Fri Nov 07, 2003 7:21 pm

Grapes of Wrath of Khan: Ricardo Montalban and his family leave the Dust Bowl of Oklahoma to travel to the Promised Land of Ceti Alpha 6. When Ceti Alpha 5 explodes, their planet becomes a wasteland. The Joads seek revenge on the crew of the Enterprise for foreclosing on their farm.

Battle Beyond the Border Stars: Angela Jolie in a turbulent romance between two star-crossed lovers set against the backdrop of an odd group of heroes trying to defend a planet of peaceful colonists from a deranged overlord.

Green Eggs and Hamlet: The Prince of Denmark seeks revenge for the death of his father by poisoned breakfast foods.
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